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(no subject)

Vegan period officially over, fish and meat keep me happy and kind of balanced. The three months meat free had been the hardest, most depressing period in my entire life.

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А вот мне интересно, как люди умудряются кошкам когти красить лаком. Моя бы убила за такое. А еще интересно, зачем?

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Ночные смены это просто зло. Постепенно сползаю со стула к полу, косметика чудом еще не размазалась. Салат рядом, который я уже час мучаю - ложку за кошку, ложку за Витеньку, ложку за мну. Пора бы с этим кончать побыстрее, старею я для таких фокусов. Хоть интерьер красивый...

Rape! Rape!

We're sitting at our bar, like every Friday night, having a beer. Everything is awesome, the people, the music. A guy and a girl we know are sitting across from us, making out, both heavily drunk. The've known each other forever, they like each other, both consenting grown ups - no harm. And suddenly I see the guy and the owner yelling and fighting. The guy leaves in a fury.

Turns out, some chick noticed the girl was very drunk. So, she went to the owner, and complained that there's rape going on in the bar, and he should totally do something about it. So the owner went to the guy, and asked him to leave. The word rape was mentioned.

Why do people throw such a harsh word around with such ease? Since when every single drunk woman is a rape victim? This just makes me mad.
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My journey to love

Working with my tattoo artist pretty much killed whatever little self esteem I had. He kept making comments about the size of my stomach and ass, kept saying how I must have bad genes. Other people followed his lead, and started making jokes about my tendency to get fat, or the way I had to split my lunch into small portions. Nobody cared the receptionist had to have a break for lunch. Everybody made sure I feel ugly and oversized. And I did. And then dance lessons started, and capoeira lessons. And a lot of sweat and hard work. And I truly saw myself. This is my body, the one that deserves all the care and attention in the world. Nobody can bring me down anymore.

(no subject)

I need nature badly. The city is getting too hectic, and my life in general is hectic.
I'd give a lot for a forest, a lake, anything really.
The only time lately, that I'm even awake early in the morning, is after a night shift on my way back home.
Because of an administrative error in my school, they're signing me up to a new group - so that means I have to start my graphic design studies all over again.
Because somebody messed up, they put me in a group half way to the finish. So I missed a lot of important basic things, and starting over means I graduate next winter instead of this summer. Which means a lot of things get put on hold. Important things. Not in the grand scheme, or the universal scale, but important to me. Going abroad, changing my job, starting a family. Obviously, there's an upside to starting my studies over - and all in all I'm pleased about starting over, having some things repeated is always nice too. And still, it frustrates me. No point changing my job right now, it doesn't really matter what I do if it's not design. No chance of going abroad during school - for obvious reasons. Having kids during school is unwise - again, for obvious reasons.
Management at work is not easy, night shifts are increasingly difficult, and I feel like I'm getting old for this bullcrap. Frustrations everywhere. All the time.
Thankfully, I have my family and friends, and my husband. I have dance and capoeira to keep me healthy and strong. I have my corner, and my little distractions, so maybe not everything is that bad.
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